Friday, 24 January 2014

Hilarious Quotes from the Collection of Murphy's Law!!

 Quotes Courtesy: The Complete Murphy's Law, by Arthur Bloch

§  Airplane Law: When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
 §  No books are lost by lending, except those you particularly wanted to keep.
 §  The Banana Principle: If you buy bananas before they are ripe, there won’t be any left by the time they are ripe. If you buy them ripe, they rot before they are eaten.
 §  Baruch’s Rule for Determinig Old age: Old Age is always fifteen years older than I am.
 §  Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn’t the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment.
 §  Buttered bread tends to fall with the buttered side down.
 §  The farther away from the entrance that you have to park, the closer the space vacated by the car that pulls away as you walk up to the door.
 §  Rule of Medicine: Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
 §  When things are going well, someone will inevitably experiment detrimentally.
 §  Cafeteria Law: The item you had your eye on from the minute you walked in will be taken by the person in front of you.
 §  Law of Menu Language: The number of adjectives and verbs that are added to the description of a menu item is in inverse proportion to the quality of the resulting dish.
 §  If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.
 §  If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.
 §  The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.
 §  Conference Principle: The speaker with the most monotonous voice speaks after the big meal.
 §  If you have the time, you won’t have the money. If you have the money, you won’t have the time.
 §  The bus that left the stop just before you got there is your bus
 §  Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.
 §  There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone, or forbid your kids to do it.
 §  Basic Law of Medicine: Pills to be taken in twos always come out of the bottle in threes.
 §  First Law of Debate: Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
 §  Dieter’s Law: Food that the best has the highest number of calories.
 §  Diners Dilemmas: A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.
 §  Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.
 §  Law of Economic Dispersion: The one you want is never the one on sale. If you like it, they don’t have it in your size. You never want the one you can afford.
 §  Double-Door Law: In approaching a double door, you will always go to the one door that is locked, pull when you should have pushed, and push when the sign says pull.
 §  Nothing is as good as it seemed beforehand.
 §  That which we call sin in others is experiment for us.
 §  Don’t try to change lines. The other line – the one you were in originally – will then move faster.



1 comment:

  1. Fact Fact Fact.!!! Intact compactible to everyone :)

    ReplyDelete